Thursday, May 22, 2014

Harmony Results In!

Saturday April 12, 2014
Dear Abby,

After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, we received your Harmony test results yesterday and they came back negative! Dr. Wenckus explained that according to the test, there is a <1 in 10,000 chance that you will have any of the three major trisomies, and they were able to confirm that you are, in fact, a girl (no delivery room surprises for us)!  She said that we were welcome to keep the fetal echocardiogram we’d already scheduled, which I was happy about, I’ll take any chance I can get to see my beautiful baby girl.  I asked if whether the soft markers we’d seen might indicate any other conditions, but she seemed to think that was very unlikely, and we would never even notice that the measurements had been slightly off.  She specifically said that you wouldn’t come out with a fat neck and short little arms and legs, but at this point I honestly wouldn’t care if you did.  Your daddy and I were prepared for whatever the outcome of the test might be, and the difficult process of waiting for the results brought us so much closer together. I cannot express what a relief it was to not be waiting anymore. 

Abby, the last couple of weeks have been some of the most emotionally challenging, but uplifting, of my life.  I learned a great deal about what it would be like to be a parent to a child with Down Syndrome, and I feel as though the stories I read and the information I gathered will not only help me to be a better mommy for you, but they will truly help me be a better person.  Before our anatomy scan I was petrified of having a child who was different from other children.  I knew that I would cherish the child I was blessed with, but I seriously doubted my ability to be strong enough to cope with whatever challenges their unique situation might bring.  I don’t feel that way anymore.  I know that there would be struggles, but that there would also be triumphs.  I stopped looking at these children for what they might not be able to achieve and started seeing the amazingly positive impact they have on the world around them.  If, once you’re born, you should have something that sets you apart from other children, I now know that I WOULD be able to handle it, and that I would work everyday to encourage you and lift you up.  This experience has helped me to accept whoever you turn out to be and I hope it helps me and your daddy to guide you to be a sensitive and loving individual, someone who sees beauty in everyone around them and cherishes each person for what they bring to our world.  

I will say, I think you not having Down Syndrome will pose its own unique challenges.  I had started to think maybe we could avoid a lot of teenage girl drama and that I might be able to keep my baby with me forever, haha.  But God has given us you and it is you that we will tailor our love and care toward.  I am so grateful and humbled that he has trusted us with your life, I hope we do a good job.  I love you Aberdeen Wren Locklear, no matter what.

Your Mommy

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